


Do Not Disturb

by Hatterized



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Awkward Sexual Situations, Blow Jobs, Coitus Interruptus, Hand Jobs, Humor, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Sexual Frustration, Smut, Voyeurism, some angst in the last two chapters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-08
Updated: 2018-11-02
Packaged: 2019-07-28 06:09:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16235759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hatterized/pseuds/Hatterized
Summary: Rick and Negan keep getting interrupted every time they get hot and heavy.OR: 5 times Rick and Negan got interrupted while trying to bone, +1 time they actually got to have sex.





	1. Carl and Enid

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something fun I've been working on! Fingers crossed that the turnaround time between updates won't be long since this is all pre-written.

Quiet weekday evenings like this are rare. Usually Rick is the last one home unless he works a graveyard shift at the station. Negan picks the kids up from school, deals with afternoon snacks- Rick suspects that he lets them eat Twinkies and hot Cheetos instead of saving those for school lunches, because they seem to run out _awfully_ fast. He takes care of dinner most nights, which is a lifesaver since Carl and Judith need to consume something other than take-out Chinese and pizza and god knows Rick’s skills in the kitchen are lackluster at best. Rick usually ends up getting home a little before plates hit the table, and he’s grateful for that. Eating dinner with his family is important to him, and being able to spend time with Carl and Judith before bedtime keeps him from feeling too guilty about his hectic work hours.

Tonight, though, it’s only eight p.m. and Judith is fast asleep in her bed because she’d worn herself out at soccer practice. Carl is out at the movies with his “just-a-friend” Enid until nine-thirty, his weekday curfew. It was a slow, uneventful day at the station that Rick passed by idly filling out paperwork and chugging more coffee than anyone really should, and as a result is entirely too wound up to be sitting at the counter watching Negan do the dishes. It’s the first night in god knows how long that Rick made dinner, a simple chicken mac-and-cheese that’s one of the few recipes that they can all eat without Judith kicking up a fuss about there being _funny business_ in it.

“You keep tappin’ your foot like that and I’m gonna go slower just to piss you off.” Negan grins over his shoulder and flicks sudsy water off his fingers at Rick, who twitches away automatically. He glances down at his foot, which- _yep_ , he’s tapping away on the side of his chair like nobody’s business. It takes a conscious effort to stop. _Damn coffee._ _Shouldn’t have had that fifth cup._

“Sorry. Too much caffeine, I guess.” Negan’s already back to scrubbing, and Rick finds himself drawn to the fabric of the thin white t-shirt Negan’s wearing. It’s one of Rick’s own- he can tell because it’s loose instead of clingy like all of Negan’s shirts tend to be, and faded from so many years of wash and wear that Rick can see the clear outline of the dark tattoo on Negan’s right shoulder. Rick shivers, thinking of how many times he’s kissed that tattoo while bent over his lover and buried balls-deep inside him. Before Negan, he’d never given tattoos much thought, but _now?_ All that ink seems to just get him going even more. It's only a matter of time before Negan talks him into getting one, too. 

“Bored outta your fuckin’ mind today, baby?” Negan chuckles. “Shit, you shoulda called me up. I could have stirred up a little trouble for you.” There’s a flirty, teasing lilt to Negan’s words that goes straight to Rick’s dick, which is already beginning to stiffen between his thighs. Before he can think better of it, Rick’s out of his seat and sliding up behind Negan, hands on the taller man’s hips and lips pressing between his shoulder blades.

“Mm,” he purrs, rocking his hips forward to let Negan feel the hardness straining against the front of his sweatpants. “Think I’d rather you start some trouble here, where I can keep an eye on you.”

He hears Negan’s shaky exhale and the sink cut off and knows he’s won.

“ _Jesus Christ_ ,” Negan grinds out, “aren’t you an eager fucking beaver today?” He dries off haphazardly so he can reach back to cover Rick’s hands with his own.

Rick rucks up Negan’s shirt to get at warm skin, his short nails raking through the dark hair leading down to Negan’s groin. Teasingly, he runs one finger right above the waistband of his jeans before unzipping him and giving him a quick squeeze.

Negan _growls_ , turning in Rick’s arms to tangle his fingers into the shorter man’s curls and draw him into a wet, filthy, open-mouthed kiss that they both moan into. Rick nips playfully at Negan’s lower lip because he knows that the other man likes it when he uses teeth, feels Negan’s palms skirting down his back and grabbing handfuls of his ass, kneading him and using his grip to better rock their erections together. “ _Fuck_ , baby,” Rick groans right into Negan’s ear, and he can practically _hear_ the other man’s brain short-circuiting.

Rick’s backed up against the kitchen counter in seconds, one of Negan’s hands rubbing at his swollen cock through his sweatpants and the other diving under Rick’s shirt to pinch at his nipple and worry it into stiffness. Rick’s got one thigh nudged up between Negan’s for the man’s hips to stutter gratefully against, his hands roaming wildly like he can’t get enough- up into his dark hair to tug and elicit a sharp, surprised whine from his parted lips, down to his ass to give him a squeeze and feel him grind down against him, pent up and desperate.

“Oh, honey, fuck yes,” Negan moans when Rick finally, blessedly begins to palm him through his jeans. Negan’s own hand quickens, his fingers rubbing at the head of Rick’s cock, and if Negan doesn’t let up soon, Rick knows he’s going to start leaking through the thin fabric. He can already feel the slickness of it seeping through his boxers. “You know just how I fuckin’ like it, Rick.” His hand circles the base of Rick’s dick best he can, giving it a firm squeeze right as he tweaks Rick’s nipple, and Rick shudders and whines into the shadow of the taller man’s neck. “And I know just how _you_ like it, don’t I?”

Rick can only manage to nod vaguely, hips rocking forward into the warm cradle of Negan’s palm, and _fuck_ , he may come just from this, but he and Negan have never been opposed to second rounds. Right now, all he can focus on is the little grunts and moans Negan’s making above him, the feel of his hand between his thighs and Negan’s cock twitching as he gets closer and closer to release-

_“Oh, god!”_

In a split second, the utter bliss Rick is wrapped up in shatters. He and Negan freeze where they are, staring into the horrified faces of Carl and Enid, who are standing in the front hallway looking like they’d rather be anywhere on the entire planet but here.

Rick shares the sentiment.

“What the _hell_ are you doing?” Carl is shouting, covering his eyes and turning his back and trying to blindly cover Enid’s as well, whose bright red face is half-hidden beneath a curtain of long hair to shield herself from the sight. Rick’s heart restarts just enough to scramble behind the kitchen counter in an attempt to conceal his wilting erection. Negan ducks behind a chair, looking uncharacteristically ruffled. He looks utterly debauched, his dark hair tousled from Rick running his fingers through it, and there are the bruising beginnings of a hickey on the side of his neck where Rick’s mouth had been. Rick feels his already pink face turn scarlet knowing that he probably looks about the same.

“What the hell are _we_ doing? What are you doing?” Negan volleys back. He’s quicker to regain his footing than Rick, who wants to melt into a mortified puddle on the kitchen floor. Carl’s still looking away, eyes bouncing from Enid to the ceiling to the still-ajar front door, and Rick has a feeling it will be at least a week before they’re able to look each other in the face again. “We thought you two were seeing a movie! No fucking offense, but why the hell are you here so early?”

“We went to an earlier showing so we could come back here and play Overwatch, and instead I come home to- to _this_!” Carl blindly gestures in their general direction. “We _eat_ in here!”

Rick’s stomach drops, because he knows exactly what Negan’s going to say next and it’s going to make him want to die of humiliation even more than he already does.

“Maybe _I_ was trying to eat something,” Negan says, like he can’t help but be inappropriate and make things worse, and Carl audibly gags.

“Oh my _god!_ ”

“You should have called and let us know you were coming home earlier,” Rick jumps in weakly before Negan pipes up again.

Carl throws his hands up in defeat. “Excuse me for not assuming we’d be walking in on you sucking face and-” he trails off, looking vaguely traumatized. Rick wonders if this is the kind of thing kids end up having to go to therapy for. 

Rick exhales a long, slow breath and rubs a hand over his burning face. “Right. Well, ah. You and Enid can…go play your game. You know the rules. Keep the door cracked.”

Carl snorts out an exasperated noise. “Kind of hypocritical of you, don’t you think?”

“ _Carl_ ,” Rick warns, and he’s scrambling for words of rebuke when Enid, god bless her, grabs Carl’s hand and all but drags him upstairs, eager to escape the cloying awkwardness brewing in the kitchen. As soon at they’re out of sight, Rick sags against the counter, head in his hands.

“Well, _that’s_ definitely not where I wanted the night to go,” Negan grumbles.

“Oh, god,” Rick groans. Up until now, Carl's been surprisingly bothered by his father dating again- and dating a man who's also his gym teacher, no less. He has a feeling that after this, Carl will be much less thrilled about the whole situation.

“I think you may have lost some authority with the open-door policy,” Negan muses. “Though I guess you could always pull the whole ‘it’s my house and I can get handjobs in the kitchen if I want to’ thing. That’s a classic fuckin’ dad move.”

“Oh, _god_.”

Rick feels Negan’s hand smoothing over his hair and he lifts his head, still blushing furiously. “It’ll be alright, Rick,” he promises, tugging the smaller man into his arms. “Next time we’ll lock the front door.”


	2. Simon

In the beginning of their relationship, before Rick had told Carl about him and Negan dating, most of their time together had taken place at Negan’s apartment. It had been a convenient hideaway until they were ready to discuss what exactly they were to each other and Rick was up to the task of coming out to his friends and family.

These days, they’re spending more and more nights together at Rick’s house. It’s cozier there, the bed bigger and the atmosphere more homey, and though it’s only been a few months since they’d agreed that their relationship is going to be a long-term thing, Negan feels more at home there than he does in his small, lonely apartment. He and Rick haven’t officially discussed moving in together, but the better half of Negan’s clothes are tucked away in Rick’s closet, his bike is more often than not found parked in Rick’s garage, and even his favorite sandalwood-scented hair gel sits on Rick’s bathroom counter. In the last month, Negan’s only been at his apartment three times, and each time was to pick up something he needed and bring it back to Rick’s place, where it found a permanent home.

Rent is cheap enough in rural King County that Negan’s not too worried about having an apartment he rarely uses, though he certainly wasn’t about to say no when his good buddy Simon asked if he could stay there and rent from him on the down low while he looks for a new place to stay.

“Just until I find something in my price range closer to work. I can’t do that roommate shit anymore, man. People these days, I’m telling you- just a load of whiners. Every other day it was ‘Simon, take the trash out, it smells like a dead fish,’ or ‘seriously, Simon, stop getting blackout drunk and pissing in my girlfriend’s potted cactus’. Like, shit, man, if I wanted to listen to someone bitch at me for leaving cigarette butts in the kitchen sink, I’d move back in with my momma, you know?”

Simon is hardly the ideal tenant, but he’s the closest thing Negan has to a best friend and he pays in cash every month without fail, so Negan’s not about to complain.

Today, he and Rick are at his apartment because they want to go out to a nice restaurant in the city and Negan’s one and only blazer is stashed in the back of his closet, unworn for god knows how long. In and out, that’s the plan.

To be entirely fair to Simon, the inside of the apartment isn’t as bad as Negan had been expecting. Sure, there are dishes piled in the sink and the trashcan is close to overflowing, and, yeah, the kitchen counter looks like the world’s shittiest bar, lined with smudged glasses and half-empty bottles of gin and tequila. It’s midday on a Friday, and Simon typically works evenings, so it’s not entirely shocking to find him with a glass of something clear and strong in his hand as he flips through Negan’s Netflix account.

“Hey hey hey, look who it is!” Simon crows when Negan and Rick step into the living room. “What brings you by, fellas? Missing my company?” He gestures grandly to the empty seat beside him on the couch and dusts off some crumbs. “C’mon, pop a squat, boys. I was just about to see how Not-Rated this movie really is. I heard there’s titties.”

Negan’s surprised that Rick is still standing beside him and hasn’t marched into his room, grabbed the blazer, and made a beeline back to the parking lot. He's not the biggest fan of Simon's frat-boy-in-his-fifties demeanor. 

“We’ve gotta pass on that, Simon. Big plans tonight. Just came to grab something outta my room and then we’ll be out of your hair.”

Simon must be decently hammered, because his attention is already back on the tv. “Alright, fellas. Guess it’ll just be me and Ginny.” He laughs to himself and swills his glass full of gin. Negan tugs Rick toward his bedroom before the movie can start. He kicks the door closed behind him and then goes right to his closet, shoving aside old sweaters to find his black blazer tucked away in the back.

“Sorry about him. I swear he’s mostly harmless.” 

Rick chuckles and flops onto the bed, long curls fanning out against the grey sheets. Arousal warms Negan’s belly as the sight draws up memories of the early days of their relationship. They’ve made a lot of memories on those sheets. “I’m sure he is. Smells like a damn bar out there, though.”

“Good thing he works in one,” Negan says as he tosses the blazer over the back of a chair. “Nobody’ll be smelling him.”

“You ready to go?” Rick tips his head at the jacket. “Or did you wanna watch the movie first?”

Negan snorts. “ _Fuck_ no. I was just thinkin’ about how this bed hasn’t seen any action in a while.” He licks his lips, eyes roaming over the solid planes of Rick’s body. “Maybe we oughta re-christen it. For old time’s sake.”

Rick laughs, and Negan crawls over him to swallow the sound, his hands already unbuttoning and unzipping. “For old time’s sake,” he agrees. “Just- _aah, Negan_ \- just a quick one.”

It’s less than a minute before they’re both stripped and Rick’s drawing out a bottle of lube from a drawer with practiced hands, eager and willing. He straddles Negan’s hips while the other man sits up against the headboard and kisses down his throat and over his chest. Negan hears the soft, breathy noises Rick’s making as he slides his fingers into himself and hums a wanting noise against the shorter man’s skin, wishing he could see what’s happening. Impatient, he slides one hand around Rick’s hip and his fingers join in, one circling Rick’s slick entrance that’s already got two fingers in to the last knuckle. Rick makes a broken, needy keening noise when the finger pushes in to join his own, hips pushing back to take it in further.

“Oh, fuck…” In an attempt to stay quiet, he crushes their lips together, letting his moans be swallowed by Negan as they stretch him open together. He can hear the wet, filthy plunge of their fingers in and out of him, can feel lube trickling down to his balls, and it nearly makes him come right then. He breaks their kiss and tugs their fingers out, blue eyes blazing with need. “Now. C’mon.” He settles back against Negan’s thighs, feels his hard, thick cock pressing up against his ass.

“ _Fuck_ , Rick. I know you need it in you, baby, but give me a second.” He smirks, but his cockiness is undermined by how breathless he is, by the way he has to stifle a whimper when Rick reaches back and grabs his cock with a slick fist to line it up. Negan’s hands slide down Rick’s back and settle on his ass, giving him a couple of playful squeezes before parting him for a smoother glide down.

It always, without fail, completely undoes him when Rick rides him like this, and Rick knows it. Ricks’ sitting all the way down on his cock, taking his dick like a goddamn champ, and it’s mere seconds before he’s rising to his knees and then plunging back down. Negan’s twisted up so tight that he feels like he’s about to snap, his teeth sinking into his tongue to keep from screaming in pleasure as Rick rises and sinks on him again and again. It’s all too much, seeing him from this angle- it always is, and to keep from coming in an embarrassingly short time, he keeps his eyes squeezed shut until-

“Look at me,” Rick commands, his voice husky with lust, and Negan’s eyes snap open without question. He’s gorgeous, his long curls bouncing, his chest rising and falling with heaving breaths, his thick cock swinging with each thrust, and Negan’s eyes just about roll back into his head when he sees-

“ _Simon!_ ” Negan yelps, his eyes wide as saucers when he spots the mustached man lurking in the cracked doorway and staring openly at Rick’s ass. Rick splutters, his ride coming to a grinding halt. He looks over his shoulder in horror to see that, indeed, they’re being spied upon, and Negan’s already seething and scrambling to pull the sheet up to cover Rick. “What the _fuck?_ What the actual fuck are you doing?” Negan shouts, crushing a red-faced Rick to his chest and feeling his softening dick slip out of him.

Simon, for his part, looks completely unabashed, which only serves to piss Negan off even more. “Hey, I was just gonna ask if you boys wanted a drink!” The sleazy smile on his face and the way he’s still leering at Rick’s bare back sets Negan’s teeth on edge. “Can’t blame me for gettin’ a little distracted. Hoo, shit, Grimes, you got one tight little ass-”

Rick growls and gives Simon a withering look. “Get the _fuck_ out. _Now_.”

Even in Simon’s inebriated state, he must register the threat in Rick’s voice because he disappears from sight, the door clicking shut behind him. Normally Rick's take-no-shit cop voice makes Negan hard as steel, but after Simon's little stunt, he just feels like he needs a shower. Negan leaps out of bed, locking the door and tossing Rick his clothes.

“Shit, fuck, Rick, I’m so fucking sorry, I didn’t realize- he’s never done shit like that before, I didn’t even think to lock the door. He’s gone. I promise, I’m kicking him the fuck out of here.”

Rick’s already half-dressed again, pink down to his chest. “Not your fault. Shit. I just…let’s just go, alright?” He buckles his belt and grabs Negan’s blazer off the back of the chair. On the way out, Negan shoots Simon an evil look that says _we’ll talk about this shit later_ and slams the front door behind him.


	3. Glenn

Negan strolls into the living room and hocks his keys onto the couch beside Rick, who's reading in what _was_ comfortable silence. “Pizza’ll be ready in twenty. I told Carl we’d pick him up on the way back, which means half the fuckin’ pie will be gone before we get home, but hey. Gives us some free time.”

Rick sets his book to the side, stuffing the receipt he’s been using as a bookmark between the pages. “Gives us, what, fifteen minutes?” His lips curve into a bemused smile as he watches Negan slink toward him, his motions fluid as a panther, and sink to his knees in front of him. He’s got that _look_ in his devilish hazel eyes- that flirty, wicked look that never fails to wind Rick up. Negan smooths large, warm palms up the inside of Rick’s parted thighs, making his legs shift wider and his hips twitch forward when Negan reaches his belt.

“I doubt I’ll need five,” Negan gloats, and Rick scoffs.

“Give me the benefit of the doubt. I’ll last at least six.” The pinked color of his cheeks and the way he eagerly raises his hips to let Negan divest him of his jeans and boxers says otherwise. Negan pushes a hand up Rick’s shirt, rubbing lovingly over his belly and up to his chest to pinch his nipples one at a time, then back down to run both hands up his bare thighs. Maddeningly slow, his palms glide from knee to groin, thumbs rubbing at the crease of Rick’s hips and then dipping down to tease his heavy balls. One wily finger dives lower, caressing the sensitive strip of skin below them because he knows it drives Rick wild. Rick huffs out an impatient breath, fighting every instinct he has to keep his ass on the couch and his hands out of Negan’s hair to guide him down to his half-hard cock. “We’ll need all fifteen if you don’t hurry up.”

Negan _tsks_ against Rick’s thigh, shaking his head just to watch Rick’s eyes roll back at the feel of short, bristly stubble against the pale skin. He eyes Rick’s cock, licking his lips at the way it twitches and fills out before him. “I doubt it.”

“Smug bastard,” Rick grumbles lovingly, and he’s about to throw a few more choice words Negan’s way, but every coherent thought in his head is chased away the instant his cock is swallowed, halfway down at first and then Negan, tricky fucker that he is, smirks around Rick and takes him all the way to the base. “ _Shit!_ ” The back of Rick’s head meets the thankfully-cushioned couch, and then his hands are in Negan’s dark hair before he can stop himself- not that Negan minds. He draws his mouth slowly, achingly up Rick’s shaft, tongue soft and wet against the underside. A hard suck to the head makes Rick hiss and sink his teeth into the heel of his hand to keep from giving Negan the satisfaction of hearing him shout.

“What was that about needing fifteen minutes, Rick?” Negan drawls mockingly. Rick’s cock stands stiff and glistening between them. Negan watches hungrily as a fat bead of precome wells at the slit before rolling down Rick’s length, making his mouth water. He follows the shining trail it left with his tongue, hears Rick curse under his breath, and takes him back into his mouth.

“Fu- _aah_ \- fucking asshole,” Rick moans like the sweetest praise. Negan chuckles around him and Rick practically _wails_.

 _Fifteen minutes, my ass,_ he thinks. 

It all starts go sideways when Rick’s phone begins to ring on the couch beside him. Negan gazes up at Rick, mouth still stuffed full, and Rick spares a glance at the phone to make sure it isn’t Carl. It is, in fact, Rick’s friend Glenn, who is likely just calling because he’s bored at work and wants to make it seem like he’s talking to a customer. The only time Glenn calls Rick instead of texting is when he’s at work. Rick taps the red button to dismiss the call and slides one hand through Negan’s hair. “’S just Glenn. Keep goin’. _Please_.” His accent is all thick and honey-sweet the way it gets when he’s turned on, and what can Negan do but comply? He pulls back just to pepper wet kisses up the side of Rick’s dick and then swallows him down again, head bobbing between Rick's thighs.

“ _Fuck_ , Negan,” Rick groans, his hips giving minute bucks into the man’s warm, wet mouth, “so good at this, baby-”

The rest of Rick’s praise is subsumed by the shrill, hateful ring of his phone. His eyes cut to the screen. Glenn again.

Negan releases him just long enough to give him a stern look. “Don’t you dare fucking answer that.”

Rick groans when Negan’s tongue swirls around the sensitive head of his cock. “Wasn’t plannin’ on it.” He lets it ring its fill this time, sighing in relief when the tone goes silent…only to start up again a moment later. Negan makes an irritated noise around a mouthful of cock and Rick debates just turning his phone off entirely, but that paranoid dad instinct stops him. What if something’s wrong? What if Glenn's not at work and he or Maggie is hurt or in trouble somewhere?

Reluctantly, Rick picks up his phone and taps the green button to answer his friend’s call. Negan, he notices, has yet to stop working between his legs.

“Glenn? You alrigh-”

“Rick! Glad I caught you. Hey, did you mean to order three large Hawaiian pizzas with extra cheese? I just saw your order come in and I thought it seemed weird.”

Rick nearly screams. When he speaks, his voice is strained with barely contained frustration.

“Hold on, Glenn.” He tips the phone away from his mouth and cuts his eyes at Negan accusingly. “You ordered all Hawaiian with extra cheese? You know Carl hates pineapple.”

Negan gives him a confused look and shakes his head, and Rick has to bite his tongue because _the bastard still has his dick in his mouth_. He takes his sweet time pulling off to answer, and every second that his lips are on his cock with Glenn on the other line, Rick feels filthier and filthier. He releases Rick with an obscene, exaggerated pop that Rick prays the phone didn’t pick up. “No, I ordered the usual. Should just be one Hawaiian.”

“Glenn says you ordered three.”

Negan snorts and laps at the head of Rick’s dick, making it jump beneath his tongue. “Tell Glenny-boy to check again, then.”

Rick stifles a half-sigh half-moan rising in his throat and raises the phone again. “Glenn, can you double-check? We just wanted one of those.”

“I’m looking at the screen right now and it says three Hawaiian along with your usual meat lover’s and triple cheese. I thought that was weird! Good thing I caught it, huh?”

The fingers of Rick’s free hand sink into the plush of the sofa cushions as Negan continues to blow him. He tries to shoot the other man a helpless, pleading look, but Negan’s much too busy to notice. “Ye-yeah, good thing,” Rick grunts out, “must have been a mistake. If you could just- _ahh_ \- uh, take those two extra ones off of the order that would be great.” Rick’s head falls back, eyes fluttering closed as Negan’s hand comes up to cup his balls and roll them gently in his palm the way he knows Rick loves.

“Yeah, no problem.” And Rick thinks that that’s going to be the end of it, but boy is he mistaken. “Lucky thing I know you guys so well, huh? Bet you don’t get this kind of service at Pizza Hut.” Rick’s cock hits the back of Negan’s throat and he has to bite down on the meat of his hand to keep from crying out.

“Glenn, I’ve gotta-”

“It’s a pretty common thing, ordering more than one of the same pizza by accident. You wouldn’t believe how many people did that same thing just this week.”

“Glenn-” Negan’s smirking and valiantly trying to keep Rick focused on what’s going on between his thighs rather than on the phone.

“My boss says it’s a user error thing, but I think he rigged the website to glitch so people get rung up for more than one and then have to pay for them. What he doesn’t realize is that most people refuse to pay for stuff they didn’t order and will cuss _me_ out for the better part of ten minutes if I imply that they ordered an extra pizza. At least he lets us take home the leftover ones that they didn’t pay for at the end of the day. I think Maggie’s getting sick of pizza, though.”

Rick can feel himself going soft against Negan’s tongue. “I’ve gotta go-”

“Ah, shit! Jeremy, don’t- ah, hell. Guess I should’ve pulled your order myself. Jeremy just put in the two extra Hawaiian pies.” Negan’s beginning to slow down as he feels Rick’s cock losing interest in what’s going on. _Fuck_. “If you guys want ‘em, I won’t charge you. Jeremy hates Hawaiian and I’m pretty sick of it after the last couple days.”

Rick sighs deeply and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Yeah, alright.”

“You’ll take them?”

“Yeah.” He looks down to see Negan brandishing his own phone so Rick can see the time- their fifteen minutes are almost up. Rick’s dick hangs sad, soft, and unspent between his thighs.

“Great! They should be done soon, the meat and cheese ones are just about to come out of the oven. You coming soon?”

Without thinking, he mutters out a bitter, "No" because there's no way they have enough time to get him there now. Glenn makes a confused sound on the other line. 

"What? Your order said carry-out. Did you want delivery?" 

Rick's face blazes with heat. "No! No, uh. Sorry. I meant yes. We're coming to get it now." Negan pouts on the floor, and Rick's dick echoes the sentiment. 

"Cool, see you guys soon. Thanks, Rick!"

“No problem, Glenn,” Rick mumbles dejectedly. He tosses his phone aside when the line goes dead, his blue eyes huge and regretful when they meet Negan’s. “Pizza’s almost finished.”

Negan gives one last gentle kiss to the head of Rick’s flaccid dick. “You’re not.”

Rick grunts out a short laugh. “Yeah…well, we’re gettin’ two extra Hawaiian free of charge, at least.”

Negan grins. “Hell yeah! Pizza for every fuckin’ meal. Let’s hit the road.” He gives Rick’s thigh a gentle squeeze before pushing to his feet, a flirtatious smile on his swollen lips. “I’ll finish you off later. See if what they say about pineapple is true.”


	4. Judith

Rick feels like he’s been half-hard since he woke up.

He and Negan are both off today, an alignment of the stars that gives them complete peace for a blessed twenty-four hours. During the school year, this doesn’t happen as often as they’d prefer, and it definitely doesn’t happen much on actual weekends when the kids are free all day, too.

It starts first thing in the morning when Rick wakes up to Negan’s warm body curled around him like an overgrown cat, his lips making their way from his shoulder to his ear. They rouse themselves from bed late in the morning, shower together, and have to keep themselves under control since they’d promised Carl and Judith they’d go hiking at Stone Mountain as a family.

The uphill climb in the humid weather should have tempered Rick’s lust at least a little bit, but he’s had no such luck. Even in late September, the Georgia heat is cloying and thick as a blanket, making sure the whole family is drenched in sweat by the time they reach the top. It’s just one of those days, it seems, because everything Negan does makes Rick want to shove him up against the nearest remotely flat surface and fuck him until they’re both too worn and weary to budge. Watching his muscles flex as he climbs a rock to get a picture with Carl or lifts Judith into his arms because she’s tired, watching him lick the cherry popsicle he got from the concession stand, and even now, watching him drive home, his large hands gripping the wheel…fuck, Rick needs it.

He’s itching to get home so badly that he’s getting restless, fingers tapping and legs crossing and uncrossing just to give him something to do that isn’t picturing Negan on his knees, swallowing his cock. Everything seems to be moving in slow motion except for the clock as they make their way back home. They get stuck in rush-hour traffic and then the drive-thru they pick up dinner from is uncommonly busy. Rick absentmindedly nibbles at Negan’s fries to keep himself occupied.

Carl, of course, makes a beeline for the shower when they get back. “Enid said she and Sophia and Mikey are all going to see that showing of _Halloween_ at the theater and I can make it if I shower in like five minutes!” he shouts over his shoulder. True to his word, he’s in and out in minutes, and he’s skidding out the door right as Sophia’s mom, Carol, pulls up in the Grimes’ driveway.

Negan plants a kiss on Rick’s cheek while he’s being tugged in the direction of the bathroom by Judith. “I’ll give her a bath and then you can put her down, alright?”

“I’m not sleepy!” Judith insists even though she was dozing on the drive home and Rick knows that once she’s bathed and in her pajamas, she’ll conk out before she can make it through an episode of Scooby Doo.

Rick tries to busy himself with the book he’s been slowly reading in his spare time, though he finds his thoughts wandering back to Negan with each turn of the page. Before long, he finds himself immersed in a fantasy involving handcuffs and Negan’s favorite red scarf, getting himself entirely too wound up.

It’s when Judith comes darting into his room with wet hair and already dressed for bed that Rick has to snap out of it.

“Daddy! Can we watch Garfield?”

Rick frowns. The water is still running down the hall. “Where’s Negan, Jude?”

Judith makes a face that only a three-year-old can pull off: full of feigned innocence that’s so transparent it’s almost funny. “He got a little wet.”

Rick’s not sure whether to sigh or laugh. “Did you splash him?”

“Noooo…” she grins, “the bathtub whale did.”

Rick sorely regrets showing Judith that she can make little waves in the bathtub so that it’s _just as fun as the pool, Jude, see?_

“Jude, you know you’re not supposed to splash the water out of the tub. Remember last week?” _When I was the one who met the bathtub whale and had to spend a half hour mopping up the bathroom floor?_

“Yeah…I said I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to splash so big.” She looks genuinely contrite somewhere underneath all that deviousness, and Rick sighs.

“Alright. Let’s get you tucked into bed. No Garfield tonight, it’s too late. Besides, that’s Negan’s favorite, I’m sure he’ll want to watch it with you tomorrow.” He’s glad that Judith likes Negan’s Odie voice so much, or else he’d probably have to lay down the law about no movies after bedtime, and he’s really not in the mood. He trails down the hall after Judith and settles into her rocking chair so she can crawl up into his lap and deposit her bedtime story of choice into his hands. Tonight it’s a story about a family of rainbow whales. How fitting.

True to form, she’s asleep in Rick’s arms before he can even get to the end of the book. His heart melts a little as Judith sleeps soundly against his chest, and he’s careful not to wake her when he rises from the chair and tucks her into bed among the menagerie of stuffed animals she keeps there.

He creeps out and leaves the door cracked behind him. The sounds of the shower have quieted, and there’s a flutter of excitement in his chest. Negan’s in Rick’s bedroom, already toweling off. “Hey,” he grins, “sorry, I swear I was gonna let you have the first shower, but the bathtub whale got me good.” Rick watches hungrily as Negan moves the fluffy gray towel over his tanned skin, down his lean torso and up those long legs that Rick’s aching to feel wrapped around his waist. “You created a monster with that shit, you know that? I mean, it sure gets her in the tub without a fight, but it’s a fuckin’ miracle that most of the tub didn’t end up on the floor or-” Negan’s words come to an abrupt halt when Rick pressed up behind him, rough jeans against bare, freshly washed skin. Rick’s hands cover Negan’s hips and his mouth roams over the warm, clean skin of his shoulders, already ravenous.

“Don’t wanna talk about that,” Rick breathes, one hand skirting up Negan’s chest to rake lines down with his blunt nails. The groan that leaves Negan’s throat shudders down Rick’s spine and makes heat pool between his legs, his cock thickening and pressing up against the taller man’s backside.

“Goddamn, Rick, you’re all wound up tonight, aren’t you?” Rick’s sure it’s meant to be a taunt, but considering how undone Negan sounds already, it loses its bite.

“Have been all day,” Rick growls, leaning up on tiptoes to nip at Negan’s earlobe, which he knows drives his lover wild. “Been waitin’ to fuck you since I woke up.”

Negan makes a tiny, desperate little keen in the back of his throat that just about makes Rick come on the spot. He presses his ass back against Rick’s clothed crotch, and Rick’s brain just about short circuits. “ _Fuck_ , Negan-”

Negan’s laugh is a rumbling purr that Rick can feel beneath his palm. “Not until you take a shower, cowboy. No fuckin’ offense, but you smell like a wet dog.”

Rick sucks a dark mark onto the side of Negan’s neck. “I’ll fuck you like a dog,” he promises, and Negan sucks in a hard breath.

“Go. Be quick before my fuckin’ balls turn blue.”

 _Not if mine do first_ , Rick thinks as he strips haphazardly and clambers into the shower. He scrubs himself quickly, the hot water doing little to abate his throbbing erection. It’s less than five minutes before he’s out of the shower and toweling off.

When he walks back into the room, Negan’s already in bed and tucked beneath the covers. Rick’s on him before either of them can think to speak.

If Rick feels like he’s burning up, it’s nothing compared to Negan, who’s got three of Rick’s thick fingers buried deep inside of him. His skin is stained a pretty pink that Rick wants to rub himself against to feel the heat. His legs are looped around Rick’s waist, hips arching up and then pushing down for more as Rick fingers him open. “ _Fuck_ , Rick, Jesus H. _Christ_ , honey, I-” Negan wars at his lower lip to stifle a needy moan as Rick rubs repeatedly over his prostate. “Gonna fuckin’ _kill_ me.”

Rick huffs a laugh and draws his fingers out slowly, rubbing them against the slick, softened opening. “Roll over,” he commands, and Negan’s squirming beneath him and turning onto his stomach immediately. Rick folds over him, his chest molded to Negan’s back, hips flush against each other. He bites kisses down Negan’s spine as he reaches between his own thighs with a lube-slick fist, coating his stiff cock liberally. His eyes practically roll back into his head at the feel of it. Christ, he feels like he’s been aching like this for days instead of hours.

“Fuck me, baby, c’mon,” Negan grunts out beneath him. “Fuckin’ ruin me with your thick fucking dick, Rick.”

Rick can’t take it when Negan talks like that, and Negan knows it. He ruts forward, his slick cock rubbing up against the curve of Negan’s ass, so close to where he’s wanted to be all day. He rocks his hips once, twice, before taking ahold of himself and inching inside. Negan groans wild and broken, and Rick can feel it from _inside_ him, and he swears that this is going to last all of thirty seconds when a tiny, sleepy little voice suddenly meets his ears.

“Daddy? Negan?”

Rick and Negan both freeze in place, and Rick thinks, _hell no, there’s no fucking way I’m thins unlucky_ , except that he is.

“Are you wrestling?”

Rick’s forehead _thunks_ gently against Negan’s shoulderblade. He has to take a deep, steadying breath and then pull out slowly, infinitely grateful for the sheet covering them from the waist down.

“Hey, Jude.” His voice is strangled even to his own ears. He rolls over gingerly, keeping his knees bent and the sheet clutched to him. “Why are you awake, sweetheart?” In the dim lamplight, Rick can see Judith’s tiny form lingering in the doorway, clutching her favorite plush purple elephant. She sniffles and rubs at her eyes, and Rick’s heart breaks.

“I- I had a bad dream,” she whimpers, “I need you to check in my closet.”

Rick knows this one all too well. Nightmares of the shadow man in her closet and how she’ll need him to stay with her until she falls back asleep. He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Alright, Jude. I’ll be right there, okay? Go get back in bed and I’ll be right there, I promise.”

“Okay,” she replies woefully, and pads back down the hallway. Rick rolls out of bed when she’s gone and pulls on a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt. Negan rolls over onto his side, his eyes huge and sad.

“We’ve been havin’ some bad fucking luck, Rick.”

Rick sighs out a mirthless noise. “You’re tellin’ me.” He shakes his head and eyes Negan’s bare body regretfully. “I’ll be a while. You know how it goes.”

“Yeah,” Negan nods. “Shit, Rick. I’ll miss you.”

Rick makes a frustrated, pathetic noise. “Don’t. I can’t. If I start thinkin’ about-” the last thing he needs is for his persistent erection to make a reappearance. “Go to sleep.”

Negan chuckles. “Alright, cowboy. You’re the boss.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up: next chapter is gonna be less funny and more angsty!


	5. Shane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of angst ahead.

Really, the only way this could have ended was poorly. In the aftermath, when Rick is able to think clearly again, he’ll see the obvious mistakes they made that led them to now.

It starts with a dinner date.

They make it a point to go out together a couple times a month, just the two of them. Their relationship isn’t in its infancy anymore, especially with how fast they’ve moved, and most nights it’s easier to order in and cuddle on the couch than get dressed up and pay a sitter so they can go see a movie or have a fancy dinner together. But it’s been a long week and they both need a break from other people, so on Friday evening Rick calls up Beth Greene with the promise of pizza money and thirty bucks to watch Judith for a few hours so he and Negan can go gorge themselves on Italian food. He digs out a newish pair of jeans out of his closet- ones without holes, at least- and attempts to wrangle his long curls into something presentable. Negan dons his black blazer instead of his usual leather, and together they set out for what they hope will be a peaceful night together.

Dinner is on Negan, who insists on paying because “I picked the restaurant and you’ve paid for pizza and takeout and groceries every day this week. It’s my turn.”

Maybe it’s because Rick’s barely eaten all day leading up to dinner, but for once he has room to split dessert. Usually when they go out, Negan insists on dessert and Rick takes a few bites but lets his boyfriend eat the lion’s share. Tonight, when their waiter brings out a generous plate of tiramisu, his mouth waters.

Their forks spar for the last bite of coffee-soaked ladyfingers before Negan eventually relents with a smile. Rick swallows down the morsel and groans quietly- he’s never had a big sweet tooth like Negan or Lori, but tonight he can’t get enough.

Negan grins and finishes off his wine. “Like a fuckin’ orgasm in your mouth, right?”

Rick’s too infatuated with dessert to mind the filth. Or maybe it’s because he chugged most of his wine after he finished his pasta and now his head is swimming lightly in the pleasant glow of alcohol and sugar and quality time with his lover. He licks his lips, eyes heavy-lidded and twinkling in the restaurant’s low mood lighting. “Maybe it’s been a while,” Rick teases, “but I don’t remember you tastin’ like that.”

Rick watches the shift in Negan’s eyes, how they go from playful to hungry in mere moments. Beneath the table, Rick feels the taller man’s calf rub up against his own. “Don’t you fuckin’ tease me,” Negan rumbles. That tone never fails to wind Rick up, and between the wine and the week of interrupted attempts at intimacy, Rick feels dangerously on the verge of dragging Negan forward by the lapels of his blazer and taking him right here at the table.

Negan either senses this or feels the same way, because he glances at the check, tosses down a handful of bills that will surely end up being a rather generous tip for their waiter, and then tugs Rick out of the restaurant and into the car.

It’s only just past eight, which means that Judith will still be awake if they go home now. In their original plans for the evening, they were going to take a walk around the park just a few minutes from the restaurant, maybe grab a bench and talk while they watched the sky turn black and starry overhead. Right now, Negan’s hand is dangerously high up on Rick’s thigh as he drives and Rick doesn’t have a damn clue where he’s going.

“Negan,” he manages thickly, his eyes darting from his lover’s face to the hand now cupping him through his jeans. “Where are you takin’ us?”

Negan’s white teeth flash in the dark, and Rick feels a dangerous, hungry thrill run through him. “That’s my little secret, darlin’. You just sit back,” he gives Rick’s stiffening cock a torturous squeeze, and Rick grunts, bucking into his palm, “and enjoy the ride.”

With the way Negan’s touching him, Rick’s worried about enjoying the ride a little _too_ much. A wiser man would probably insist that they go home and put Judith to bed so they could fuck in the comfort of their own bedroom, but Rick’s blood is rapidly shooting south and the only thing he can really think about is how badly he wants Negan inside of him.

To Rick’s surprise, they end up at the park as planned. He’s about to launch into a lecture about how _we can’t fuck on the playground, Negan_ , but it’s not necessary.  Negan bypasses the playground and parking lot and continues to drive along the road even after it turns to dirt and gravel. There’s a definite path here, though, one that cars have driven before, worn tracks curving through the dirt. The park disappears from sight, obscured by the thick growth of trees, and after a minute the path opens up to a small grassy area that even Rick is able to recognize the purpose of. He snorts and shakes his head. A lover’s lane.

Negan pulls up and parks in the empty space. Rick can see his wicked grin even in the low light. “You ever done this before, Rick?”

Rick has to roll his eyes. “I wasn’t as repressed in high school as you like to pretend I was.” He unbuckles his seatbelt, pops Negan’s as well, and leans in close enough that he can tip his face up and steal a slow, dirty kiss. “My parents were real overprotective and Lori’s were always at home. We had to go _somewhere_.” He can easily recall twilit nights in little alcoves like this in his hometown, only there were a half dozen other cars with horny teenage couples around them.

Negan smirks into their kiss and nips at Rick’s lower lip, making it sting. “Naughty boy,” he praises and Rick rolls his eyes and kisses him more thoroughly. “You gonna get in the backseat with me, Ricky?” Negan’s large hands smooth down Rick’s back and begin untucking his shirt. “Show me just how naughty you can be?”

Rick’s mouth finds Negan’s neck and he nips hard, hard enough that Negan grunts a needy noise and his hips buck up into nothing. Rick smirks and shoves the blazer from the taller man’s shoulders. “Do you ever shut the hell up?” he teases affectionately.

Negan’s body quakes with laughter and he lets Rick divest him of his shirt. “Nope.”

It’s a minute or two of awkward fumbling, knees knocking and heads hitting the roof of the car before they both manage to clamber into the backseat. The whole maneuver is made more difficult by Negan trying to get Rick’s pants off while it’s happening.

“If you’d just fuckin- hold on, let me- shit! No, I’m good, that was just my stomach. Jesus, Grimes, you’ve got one mean elbow on you. A couple inches lower and I wouldn’t have been able to dick you down.”

Rick shakes his head and sighs and lets himself be maneuvered out of his jeans and into Negan’s lap. Once he’s there, Negan rubs his hands lovingly up Rick’s inner thighs, teasing the hem of his briefs. “You wore the ones I got you.” He tugs at the silky black material and Rick blushes. He’s only worn them a few times, and usually they’ve come off as quickly as he put them on.

“Wanted to look good for my date,” Rick husks out, a crimson blush coloring his cheeks and spilling down his throat. Negan’s hands circle his hips, urging him to rise up a little, and Rick gives a weak, breathy laugh into his lover’s dark hair. “Takin’ ‘em off already?” He blushes harder when he feels Negan tug the soft fabric down to mid-thigh. His heavy cock springs up between them, and he has to fight the urge not to squirm against the exposure. Despite his earlier cockiness in the face of Negan’s teasing, he hasn’t fucked around in the back of a car in years and the thrill and risk of it is definitely getting to him.

“Don’t want to fucking ruin them,” Negan replies. He licks his lips as he takes the sight of Rick in, smirking at the pink in Rick’s cheeks and chest. “Hand me my blazer, baby.”

Rick twists in his lap, reaching blindly into the front seat to grab the requested jacket. He feels Negan unbuttoning his shirt the rest of the way as he does so, and he’s about to tell him to let him leave it on, but Negan already seems to know that Rick won’t want to be completely bare. He leaves the blue fabric hanging open and loose, enough to give him a nice view of his lover’s muscled chest and belly, and takes the blazer when Rick hands it to him. He reaches into a pocket and withdraws a small bottle of lube, making Rick laugh. “You had that on you all night? You couldn’t have just put it in the glove compartment?”

Negan grins and slicks his fingers while Rick watches, rapt. “Gotta be prepared for every situation, Rick. What if we wanted to get freaky in the bathroom back at the restaurant?”

“I think I could have waited,” Rick replies archly, though his calm demeanor quickly shivers apart when Negan slides a hand around his waist and rubs over his opening with slick fingers. He feels the muscles there flutter involuntarily when Negan traces circles around the rim, and he lets his head fall to Negan’s bare shoulder, pressing kisses there to muffle the groan caught in his throat. There’s pressure at his opening and then one finger is sinking inside, and Rick makes a soft noise against Negan’s skin.

“I don’t think you could have,” Negan whispers back, and hell, maybe he’s right, because the way he’s winding Rick up right now, with one hand petting heavily down his spine while that wicked finger slides in and out of him, rubbing up against the sensitive spot inside that makes him want to scream, Rick isn’t sure he’s going to be able to last. He feels a second finger press against him, and he presses back against it, taking it in. Negan rumbles like a contented cat as Rick fucks himself on his fingers. “So fucking _hot_ , Rick, god _damn_. I could come in my fuckin’ pants just watching you.”

Rick takes his lover’s praise right to heart, letting it spread warm and sweet through his chest. He pulls back just enough to look Negan in the face, see the dusky pink of arousal coloring his cheeks and the way his hazel eyes are clouded over with lust. They meet in the middle, mouths hungry and seeking each other. Rick slides his tongue between Negan’s parted lips, matches the rhythm that Negan’s fingers are setting inside of him, and is rewarded with a low, gratified moan. He’s just about to warn Negan that he’s dangerously close to coming early when there’s a sharp rap on the window to their right and they both freeze in place.

“Hey! You two need to move the hell along, this is a public-”

Oh, _fuck_. Rick knows that voice.

There’s a flashlight shining into the car, blinding enough in the dark that Rick can’t make out Shane’s face, but he would know the voice of his best friend anywhere.

His best friend that he forgot was working tonight. His best friend that still thinks Negan’s just a good friend from group therapy because Rick’s been too afraid to tell him that he’s into men.

There’s a long, awkward silence where Negan gently eases his fingers out of Rick and Rick is praying that god will smite him where he sits just to spare him the humiliation of being caught-literally- with his pants down like this. He can only imagine that Shane feels about the same, though with more of an emphasis on erasing the image of his childhood friend getting fingered in the backseat of a car by another man.

“Ri- _Rick_?” Shane chokes out. He sounds like he’s in shock. Rick wonders if maybe his brain will block out this memory to save him from the trauma of it all. “What the fuck are you- what…?” He trails off helplessly, gesturing at the two of them like he can’t quite make sense of what he’s seeing.

“Hey, man,” Negan chimes in, “I know this is kind of a big fuckin’ moment here, but would you mind maybe ditching the flashlight? I’m not tryin' to go blind.”

It’s a sign of just how traumatized Shane is that he wordlessly clicks the light off. Usually he puts up a fight at the first sign of mouthiness from a civilian. Once the blinding light is gone, everything seems so much worse. Rick can clearly see the gape of Shane’s mouth and confusion in his eyes. Awkwardly, he reaches beside him on the seat and grabs Negan’s blazer to cover himself.

“Shane,” he begins, “I-”

“Get dressed.”

Panic wells in Rick’s chest. “Shane, we need to talk about-”

“Rick,” Shane interrupts,” “no offense, man, but I really don’t want to talk about this while your dick’s out.”

Yeah, that’s fair.

Shane turns away. Wordlessly, Rick maneuvers himself out of Negan’s lap and back into his pants. He buttons up his shirt and realizes too late that it’s crooked, but it’s better than nothing. With a furtive glance at Negan, who looks rather shell-shocked himself, he opens the car door and joins Shane in leaning against the passenger side. Shane’s eyes are focused determinedly on some spot over the treeline.

“So, ah. Negan and I are…together. Guess you figured that out.” It occurs to him that it never gets easier to tell someone for the first time. God, he wishes it did. Maybe it’s just because of how it happened. Maybe it’s because it’s Shane, the person who’s been with him through everything from teenage hijinks to getting married to the birth of his children. Maybe it’s because he remembers how back in high school Shane and his buddies from the football team would joke about how Tomas Evanson, the quiet, artsy boy who ran the yearbook club, was a ' _big ol’ fuckin’ fairy'_.

“I’m sorry you found out this way. It was stupid, comin’ out here. We weren’t thinkin’.” Rick stares down at his feet. The leg of his jeans are uneven, one haphazardly stuffed into a boot while the other is all bunched up at mid-calf calf where Rick had pulled them on too fast.

“Yeah,” Shane agrees, “it was stupid.” His tone makes Rick feel like a scolded child. “So…what? You’re a fuckin’-” Rick squeezes his eyes shut, cringing and waiting for the cruel words that he’s heard tossed around locker rooms years ago. The ones that had made him divert his eyes away from the other boys when they’d been running in gym class and stick close to Shane for protection, because nobody would dare accuse him of that if Shane was by his side.

Shane seems to catch himself. He breathes out hard. “So all those years with Lori- that was nothing?”

It hits Rick so hard he nearly cries. He's a grown man of forty-five, and he nearly breaks down crying in the dirt because nothing could have been more cruel than throwing Lori in his face and implying that she had meant nothing to him, and Shane knows it. He’d have preferred the slurs.

“Lori was _everything_ to me,” Rick hisses between his teeth. He has to grit them to keep from shouting. “I loved her. I _still_ love her. This doesn’t change that.” He tips his head back, blinking away tears that are making the stars overhead turn blurry. “I can like both.” _She knew I liked both_ , he wants to say. _She was the first person I ever told, and she still loved me._ He holds it back, though- he senses that part of Shane’s anger comes from Rick keeping this a secret from him. God knows that if he found out that Rick has already come out to most of his other friends, he'd be livid.

“How long?”

Rick blinks. “How long what?”

“How long have you and him been…” Shane makes a vague gesture with his hands.

“A couple months. We really did meet at group therapy. He lost his wife, too. All of that’s true. I just…wasn’t ready to tell you we’re together.”

“ _Why?”_ Shane asks, and for the first time, he turns to look Rick in the eye. He looks hurt, but considering what he said a minute ago, Rick’s not too sympathetic.

“Maybe because I knew you’d react like this.” In truth, he was terrified it would be much, much worse. That Shane would say all of the things Rick can tell he’s holding back. He knows how Shane felt about Lori. Lori knew, too, and she didn’t like it any more than Rick did. He never acted on it, hence why he and Rick are still friends, but Rick knows Shane well enough to practically read his mind, and when he’d brought Lori into the conversation, he knew that Shane was skirting around what he really wanted to say: _I knew you weren’t man enough for Lori. I always thought I would have been better for her, and this just proves it._

“It’s a lot to fucking take in, man.” Shane sighs and kicks at the dirt. “The way I found out didn’t help. Never wanted to see you with some fuckin’ guy’s fingers up your ass.”

Rick’s face burns. When he and Negan first got together, there had been moments where all of that shame and self-hatred from his youth and the years in the closet had risen up, and Negan had always helped him beat those thoughts away. Now, for the first time in months, he feels ashamed again.

“I’m sorry you- you had to find out like that. I am. Trust me, that’s not how I imagined this happening, either.”

Shane nods and rubs a hand over the back of his head. “Yeah. Well.” He glances over at his squad car. “I should probably get goin’.” Rick’s stomach clenches. “On duty, you know. You two should go home.”

Rick swallows hard. “Shane-”

“I’ll see you at work on Monday.” Shane’s already walking away, not sparing so much as a glance back at him. Rick tastes the garlicky sauce of his pasta rising in the back of his throat. He watches, feet rooted to the ground, as Shane starts up his car and pulls away. He blinks and blinks and it’s not until Negan comes up beside him and pulls him into his arms that he realizes he’s shaking.

“Shh, hey.” Negan buries his face into Rick’s long hair, planting kisses there. “You’re alright, Rick. It’s gonna be alright.” Gently, Negan guides him into the car, straps him in and starts it up. “I’m sorry, baby. Fuck, I shouldn’t have parked out here. I didn’t even think about…” He sighs. “I just wasn’t fucking thinking. Should have known we’d get caught with the week we’ve been having.”

“Not your fault,” Rick manages. “It’s not. It would have been like this no matter what. I mean- it would have been better if it hadn’t been like this, but he…that’s just how he is.”

Negan reaches over and covers Rick’s hand where it sits in his lap. Seeming to sense that Rick needs some quiet, he simply drives them home in silence, leaving his hand there to try to ease Rick’s mind.


	6. + 1

Beth is curled up in an armchair in the living room when Rick and Negan get home. A movie is playing on the tv, but she seems to only be half-watching, more focused on the journal in her lap. She smiles up at them when they walk in. “Hey. Have a good night?” There’s a knowing sparkle in her eyes and Rick isn’t sure what she’s getting at until he follows her gaze to his poorly-buttoned shirt. _Well, shit._

Negan swoops in to save him. “Dinner was fuckin’ great. You and Noah ought to give it a try sometime- it’s the little mom and pop Italian place that just opened up, Tuscan Garden.”

Rick feels on edge and vulnerable and embarrassed by his stupid shirt and everything that’s happened and as much as he loves Beth, all he wants to do is crawl into bed and stay there. He reaches one hand out to squeeze her shoulder. “Thanks for watchin’ her. She in bed?”

Beth nods. “Just went down about a half hour ago. She should sleep like a log, we ran around the backyard playin’ Peter Pan and Captain Hook for a long time. She was out before her head hit the pillow.”

That’s good news, at least. With any luck, she’ll sleep through the night and it’ll be one less thing to deal with. “Thank you.” He reaches into his pocket to pull out his wallet but Negan waves him off gently.

“This one’s on me, Rick. Go check on your baby girl.”

Rick’s too drained to argue. He waves goodbye to Beth and lets Negan pay her and send her off, seeking refuge in the quiet of the upstairs. Judith’s bedroom door is open, and Rick pokes his head in to see her sleeping soundly among her sea of stuffed animals. Tonight, she’s clutching the fluffy blue owl that Beth had given her for her last birthday, and for the first time since he saw Shane’s face earlier, he smiles. She must have had a good time, then.

Rick has always raised Judith to know about Lori. He didn’t know how to at first- how the hell do you explain to a little girl that _yes, she has a mommy like the other kids, but she’s not here anymore. But she still loves you, Jude. She loves you so much, and I know she wanted to meet you._

When Judith’s hair had started growing in wild and curly like Rick’s but starkly pale blonde, Shane had once teased that _Lori must have found herself a nice blonde fella_. He’d been joking, of course- Lori had been blonde as a child, and so had her siblings, but their hair had slowly darkened over the years to shades ranging from honey to Lori’s own dark brown. That was the last time he and Shane had exchanged truly angry words, the last time Rick had been truly furious with his best friend. He and Shane seemed to clash over little things all the time- they always had- but only when someone stepped fully out of line did they really argue. Rick can count the times over the years that’s happened on both hands, and considering how argumentative and hotheaded Shane can be, he thinks that’s pretty good.

Thirty years. That’s how long Rick and Shane’s friendship has carried on. It’s withstood high school and girlfriends and jealousy and college and career paths and kids. It’s withstood Shane admitting he’s in love with Lori and that he often wished that Rick’s family was his own. It’s withstood Lori’s passing and the devastation of her loss that Rick still feels every day. Up until now, Rick was sure that nothing could shake the bond they had.

His thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the front door closing and locking downstairs. Negan climbs the stairs and sees Rick lingering in Judith’s doorway, meets him there and pulls the shorter man into his arms. Rick tenses at first before willing himself to relax. _We’re not doing anything wrong._

“She looks so much like you,” Negan murmurs into his ear. “Especially when she’s sleeping. Gets that same peaceful look on her face you do.” When Rick only nods, Negan presses a kiss to the short curls at his temple. “Come to bed.”

He leads Rick to his bedroom- their bedroom, really- with their fingers intertwined. Negan’s presence in the world is so loud and gruff, but here, in Rick’s home, in his bedroom, he’s gentle, especially when Rick needs it. He guides Rick to sit on the edge of the bed and sinks to his knees in front of him to help Rick take his boots off. He doesn’t toss them aside- he knows better. Rick treasures those beaten-up boots, and he places them neatly beside the dresser. He digs his thumbs into the soles of Rick’s feet, kneading the nearly-nonexistent arches while he takes off his socks. Rick’s toes crack, and Negan smiles and presses a kiss to the thick material of Rick’s jeans where they cover his knee.

They don’t speak, just like in the car. Negan’s got about a thousand words dancing on the tip of his tongue, but he knows Rick doesn’t need to hear them this very second. Instead, he rises and unbuttons Rick’s shirt, slides it of his shoulders and tosses it to the floor. With one gentle hand splayed in the center of Rick’s bare chest, Negan eases him back to lay on the bed. He flicks the button of Rick’s jeans open, unzips him, hooks his fingers into both the denim and the black silk underneath, and feels Rick stiffen.

“Don’t,” he whispers softly, the word nearly a plea, and it breaks Negan’s heart. He slides his fingers out of Rick’s underwear, tests his grip on the jeans with a light tug.

“This okay?”

Rick shifts his hips the slightest bit. “Yeah.”

As soon as the jeans are down Rick’s legs and pooled on the floor, Negan feels his mouth watering at the sight before him- bare legs, thighs parted just enough to invite him between, rich black silk boxer-briefs covering Rick where Negan wants to put his mouth.

Except then Rick draws his legs up and pulls the covers over himself, staring blankly at the wall. Negan shucks his own clothes down to his briefs and climbs into bed with him, tangling their legs together and smoothing his foot down Rick’s calf.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “We should have just come home.”

“Not your fault,” Rick murmurs against his chest. "I should have told him when I started tellin’ everyone else. I just…” he sighs. “I knew it would be like this.”

Not for the first time, Negan’s thankful that he grew up with a bra-burning hippie mother and that all the people he ran with growing up were more concerned about dodging cops after midnight drag races than who Negan was sleeping with. He got lucky with who he grew up around, and moving to Rick’s one-horse town deep in the Bible belt this late in life hasn’t been enough to shake his confidence in himself. Rick, on the other hand…he grew up in a place just like this, went to church with his parents on Sundays to hear people like him called abominations, saw the few brave- or just very unlucky- kids who were out in his high school days get slurs hurled at them like stones.

“It doesn’t change anything, Rick,” he whispers into his lover’s thick hair. “Doesn’t change a damn thing. You’re the same person he always fucking knew.”

“He’s not gonna see it like that.”

“That’s his fucking problem, then,” Negan mutters. “Far as I’m concerned- far as anyone _decent_ should be concerned, he’s the one with shit to get over. Not you.”

Rick sighs and presses closer so that they’re sharing one pillow, noses a few inches apart. “Feels like I’m in the wrong. He’s got a way of doin’ that, I guess. Standin’ out there with him- I felt like I should be beggin’ him to forgive me. For what, I don’t even know. For not telling him the second I knew. For being some way that he thought I wasn’t.”

Negan growls. “You don’t have to apologize for _shit_.”

Rick flops over onto his back. “Maybe.” His eyes flutter closed, and Negan wants to reach out and run a finger along the perfect curve of his lips. “I just wish he hadn’t brought up Lori. More than anything…I’d rather him act like he did in high school, you know?” His Adam’s apple bobs, and Negan presses a kiss to his throat.

“Lori loved you. Every part of you. This didn’t change anything for her, and it shouldn’t change anything for him.” Tentatively, he runs the tips of his fingers from Rick’s collarbone down to his navel, earning a shiver. He noses against Rick’s shoulder and hooks one leg over his thigh and is gratified and a little relieved when Rick slings and arm around him and holds him closer.

“I don’t want to feel like I did back when we started,” Rick says, and Negan knows exactly what he means: the years of repressed guilt and self-loathing and shame rising up whenever Negan would touch him intimately, when he had to lie to Carl and his friends about where he’d been because he wasn’t ready. Every new step they’d taken together had been Rick’s first step in a new direction, and that path hadn’t come without roadblocks. Negan had never moved so slow with someone when it came to the physical, but it was what Rick needed, so he was more than able to put on the brakes whenever it got to be too much and Rick would pull away, face flushed with arousal and embarrassment.

“There’s nothing wrong with you,” Negan whispers into Rick’s skin. It’s familiar, a well-worn sentiment that he’s said to Rick over and over throughout the course of their time together. He hasn’t had to pull it out as much recently, and for that he’s grateful. His hand skims down Rick’s belly to rest over the little thatch of hair between his navel and the waistband of his underwear, and Rick shivers against him. “There’s nothing wrong with us.”

He’s not sure if Rick wants him to go any further. It’s been a long night that’s capped off a long week, and even though he was wound up and ready to go less than an hour ago, Negan wouldn’t expect him to feel the same way now. He doesn’t care- as long as Rick’s okay, as long as he’s in his arms, Negan’s happy.

But that doesn’t mean that when Rick’s hips shyly twitch forward and he tucks his face into the shadow of Negan’s neck that a little thrill of arousal doesn’t shoot through him. Negan’s hand slides lower to cover Rick through his briefs, cupping gently and giving him a squeeze when he feels his lover’s cock begin to thicken. He can feel Rick panting, breath warm against his collarbone. “ _Please_ ,” he whispers, and that’s all Negan needs to hear.

He doesn’t tease- or he doesn’t mean to, anyway. Negan’s a fast learner when it comes to Rick, and he knows that Rick likes foreplay even in his foreplay, his balls cupped and his perineum rubbed and the underside of his cock traced with a fingertip until he drips. Maybe it’s because of their many interrupted trysts over the last week, but tonight, Rick’s too impatient for all of that. Negan’s got him by the balls when he grabs the waistband of his briefs and pushes them down. His cock, hard and needy and dewy at the tip, springs up and Negan follows the sway of it with his eyes, mesmerized. No matter how many times he sees Rick like this, he never ceases to be utterly captivated by his lover’s bare body. The first time he’d seen Rick naked, he’d fallen to his knees, and mentally, Negan’s not sure that he’s ever gotten up. He gives Rick’s dick a few firm strokes just to watch Rick thrash on the sheets. Negan’s own cock is a bit longer, but Rick’s is thicker, and despite the playful teasing, Negan prefers Rick’s every day of the week. Just like the first time, Negan finds himself staring with awe and imagining Rick’s fat, perfect cock buried deep inside of him.

Rick, however, seems to have other plans. He squirms and kicks off his underwear, his legs falling open to persuade Negan to nestle between them- an invitation he can never resist. He sheds his own underwear and rolls over, letting Rick trap him between thick, strong thighs. One hand on the back of Negan’s neck draws him down for a kiss that makes Negan feel blessed and lost and weak in the best possible way. Rick’s legs shift up higher, and Negan groans, feeling his cock rub against Rick’s hard length. “Make love to me,” Rick drawls into his ear, and Negan keens.

“Oh, _fuck_ , baby.” Rick presses a bottle of lube into his hand and raises his hips only to suck in a hard breath and clench when Negan’s fingers slide over his still-stretched opening. Negan can feel him trying to relax, and it’s familiar in a sad way. It’s how he reacted the first time Negan had touched him there- and the second and the third and the fourth. Ashamed of his body, of Negan’s touch and how much he wanted it despite being told over and over throughout his life that he _shouldn’t_ want it, that it made him something less.

“You’re okay, Rick,” Negan whispers, his fingers tracing lazy, feather-light circles around Rick’s slick opening. “It’s okay. You’re beautiful,” he puts a little more pressure there, feels Rick’s body begin to relax and let him in. “You’re perfect.” Rick lets out a shuddering sigh of pleasure when Negan’s finger slides in up to the knuckle and curls _just_ right. Rick’s mouth explores every inch of Negan’s skin he can get at- the hollow of his throat and the jut of his chin and the top of his shoulder are all peppered with kisses from soft, plush lips. “ _Perfect, perfect, perfect._ ”

It starts off as lovemaking and becomes something else. Negan’s deep inside of Rick, rocking into him and holding him close, one hand in his hair and one cupping the curve of his ass, and Rick’s heels are sliding down Negan’s back and over his thighs, trying to get closer and push him deeper even though they’re sandwiched together and Negan’s balls are pressed up against Rick’s ass. Rick looks perfect beneath him, Negan thinks- flushed and worked up with his full lips parting in a gasp on each inward push. He dives in for a kiss and the next thing he knows he’s being nudged upward to sit and Rick’s knees are around his waist and he’s got the full weight of Rick in his lap and the other man is rocking his hips to take Negan’s cock back inside.

Negan groans brokenly, clutching at Rick’s firm, full ass to help him better ride his thrusts. He knows Rick won’t last long like this, not with how he’s huffing and moaning and burying his face into Negan’s shoulder as he takes it. Their rhythm is still languid and unhurried, but Rick seems so wound up that he could go over the edge at any moment. His cock is trapped between their bellies, catching friction with every movement, and Negan’s just about to slide a hand between to stroke him when Rick bites down on the meat of his shoulder to muffle the urgent cry that tears out of him as he finishes. His whole body shudders and grows tight around Negan, thighs clamping down around his waist and muscles clenching, and between that and the feeling of Rick’s come spilling wet and warm and messy between them, Negan nearly follows his lead. Only the thought of what he wants to do next staves off his own orgasm.

He kisses Rick through it, clutching him close and stroking his hair and whispering praise while Rick rides out his high. When he’s finished, Negan lays him back down on the bed and pulls out, and Rick, fucked out and exhausted as he is, frowns and reaches for him. “You didn’t come,” he murmurs. His thighs inch apart again and Negan has to bite down on his lip to keep from whimpering at the sight of Rick all stretched and slick from his cock and his fingers. “Use me,” he continues, and Negan makes a pathetic, needy sound in his throat. “Wanna make you come.”

Negan breathes out, trying to calm himself, and leans down to bite kisses up Rick’s chest and neck all the way to his lips. “Oh, I’m gonna use you, baby. Don’t you fucking worry about that.” His fingers skim down Rick’s belly, coated in creamy white, and Rick makes a confused sound. Negan straddles Rick’s hips and brings the fingers behind him, and Rick’s eyes go wide, lust clouding the pale blue.

“ _Negan_ ,” he groans, watching with avid interest as Negan slides the fingers into himself, working slow and putting on a show. It’ll be a few minutes before Rick can get back to where Negan needs him, anyway.

Maybe it’s a good thing they haven’t been able to have sex all week- Rick already seems to be hungry for more. His hands greedily roam over Negan’s chest, his back, his legs and ass. He lingers on the tattoo on Negan’s chest, tracing the delicate inked lines carefully as if he were the one drawing them there. When he reaches for Negan’s cock, though, he finds his wrists grabbed and pinned to the bed. “Wouldn’t fucking do that if I were you, Rick,” Negan warns, “I’ve been savin’ myself for you. Not everybody’s got your stamina.”

Rick laughs, his eyes crinkling in that charming way that makes Negan weak in the knees. “I’ll be right there with you in a few years.” One hand wrestles free and his fingers settle into the space where Negan’s were, testing the stretch. Negan makes a desperate noise and fucks back onto them.

“Enjoy it while you can,” Negan says. True to form, Rick’s cock is already attempting to rise again. “If I’d have met you twenty, thirty years ago, I’d never let you leave the bed. Your ass would be the Grand fuckin’ Canyon.”

Rick snorts. “How ‘bout you just enjoy the one fuck a night your dick can manage.”

Negan frowns, offended. “I can manage more than fucking _one_. I need to remind you?”

Rick smiles up at him, sweet and sexy and shy. “I remember plenty.”

“Just need more time to recover than you,” Negan insists.

“And more Viagra,” Rick teases, and his smart mouth earns him a hard pinch to one nipple that makes him whine. His head falls back onto the pillows, fingers slipping out of Negan. “ _Fuck_. How d’you want it?”

Negan rises to his knees above Rick and smirks down at the gorgeous man beneath him. “Just like this, cowboy.” He takes Rick in with a slow, smooth glide down and Rick makes a breathless noise of encouragement. He’s sure that if Rick wasn’t so wound up, he’d make some comment about how _he_ isn’t the cowboy in this situation, but as it is, he can barely string two words together. It’s all he can do to meet Negan’s thrusts, their hips rolling in time to Negan’s fiery pace.

He meant to go slow, but now that he’s actually on Rick’s dick, Negan can’t help himself. He plants both hands on Rick’s firm chest and rides him hard, all but fucking Rick into the mattress. It gets _loud_ \- loud enough that they should probably be worried about waking up Judith, but there’s not enough room in Negan’s mind to focus on anything other than how fucking perfect Rick feels inside of him and how close he is to coming.

“C’mon,” Rick moans below him, and those blue eyes lock onto his, holding him there. “Come all over me.”

Getting dirty talk like that out of Rick is a rarity in itself, and tonight it’s so shocking and _unbelievably_ hot that Negan’s helpless to do anything but obey him, taking Rick’s cock in to the hilt and spilling over Rick’s heaving chest and belly. It seems to go on for ages, that lightheaded, intoxicated feeling, and it’s not until he feels Rick’s hips jerk and stutter and a warm, wet gush inside of him that he begins to drift back into himself just in time to see Rick’s face as he comes again.

For all of his insistence that he can keep going if Rick gives him enough time, Negan feels like he could sleep for about a week. Rick isn’t any better- he doesn’t even move to try to clean up or spare the sheets when Negan lifts off and collapses bodily beside him on the bed. They’re both sticky with sweat and come but Rick just cuddles up to Negan’s side, throws an arm around him to pull him to his chest, and mumbles something incoherent in his ear.

“What?” Negan asks lazily, already drifting off to sleep in Rick’s warm, strong arms. He’s sure that he couldn’t open his eyes even if he wanted to.

“Said _I love you_ ,” Rick murmurs again. His voice is adorably thick and rough with exhaustion, and Negan manages a tiny smile that Rick feels against his chest where his lover’s face is buried.

“Love you too.”

* * *

Rick wakes up first the next morning, as per usual. Negan’s still snoring softly against his shoulder. _We must have slept like logs_ , Rick muses, _we’ve barely moved._

He reaches for his phone on the nightstand, wanting to text Carl and double-check when he’s planning on coming back from Mikey’s today. When he taps the screen, he sees that he’s already got a text waiting, but it’s not from his son. It’s from Shane.

Rick reads the words over and over again, letting them sink in and soothe the gnawing ache of worry that opened up in his chest when Shane caught them last night.

_Sorry about last night. I didn’t take it as well as I should have. Reckon Negan’s got to be an alright guy if you like him that much. I’ll see you Monday, brother._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The good news is that I get to unpin this from my long list of wips in Word. The bad news is that I started yet another fic in the dead of night last night so....one step forward one step back lmao. Thank you @ everyone who's read and commented!


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